Friday, May 25, 2018

What is Funeral Etiquette? . . . 10 Important Things

I attended a funeral of a close friend. I discovered that she was doing the eulogy of her son's funeral. That was the first time I saw that. She also did a great job. So many times, I  assumed that the minister would do it.


Memorial Service




Wikipedia. Org defines eulogy as "as a speech or writing in praise of a person or thing."

Now for a long time I thought that only ministers did the eulogy at a home going ceremony. I discovered that is not always the case. Others are giving eulogy speeches.


1. Don't fight at a funeral.

This is just the wrong thing to do. When you fight, what type of example are you setting for your children? Tempers and emotions may be extremely sensitive at this time. This should be a time to not think about yourself, but to think about the family of the deceased. I recall as I drove past a funeral home, there were several police cars there and family members were arguing.



2. Don't play inappropriate music for the funeral

Music can be played during family hour or during the viewing at the funeral home. I went to a funeral where they were playing a rhythm and blues song that was talking about "bumping and grinding and making love. " This was quite inappropriate. There were small children there too. Maybe the deceased loved that song, but the funeral was not the appropriate place to play it, especially with small children present. I have heard many rhythm and blues songs that would have been much more appropriate.





3. Don't say anything, if you cannot think of something positive to say.

4. Do bring laughter to the family.

Laughter is so important during this time. In the article 



I emphasize how laughter helps you. The family is already grieving, so laughter can just help ease the grieving process. During remarks try to think of good times that you had with the deceased individual and share this. Do make positive and truthful remarks about the deceased.




5. Do Give a Hug

Sometimes you may not have the words to comfort your love one, but do give a hug. A hug says it all. I talk about the importance of hugging in the article:



 6.  Do Think Clearly

Do think of ways that you can help the family during this time. Usually immediate family members may not be thinking clearly. If this is the first loved one that they have lost, they may be at a lost as to what should be done. Usually the funeral homes are fairly helpful when planning the funeral.





7. Do Make an Offer

Do offer to help with a collage (pictures) of family members. This may be on display before the funeral. Also, CD's can be made to play during the family hour. This can be quite comforting and reassuring to view the pictures of family members and friends. If you have technical skills that might be helpful, offer them to the family.

I recall when my mother-in-law passed away. I assisted my brother-in-law with editing the pictures for the CD. We are a large family. There were many pictures, some of which I did not even know who the family members were, but that they were in the family. During the funeral many of the members could point out and tell me who that family member was.

8. Do View the Body

Do go by the funeral home to view the body, especially if you will not be able to attend the funeral. Plan to attend the family hour. This is a time to console the family. This is a time to let them know that they are not alone. Sometimes you do not have to say anything, maybe give them a hug as I mentioned earlier.  Also,  a smile definitely may help.   Let them know that you are there for them. Your kind words can mean so much to them.

9. Do write a poem, If you are good at doing that.

10. Do Show Respect

Do be respectful of others and offer money to the family. There is no need for rudeness or disrespect. Funerals are expensive. All families may not have insurance for the cost of the burial.

Note:

There was a time that black clothing was always worn to a funeral. Now I have seen different colors and several times "all white." The white to represent the deceased home-going to the Lord. In fact I recall a funeral where all the immediate family wore all white. It was a lovely site to see.


Photo Caption:

Pixabay, CCO Creative Commons 

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Friday, May 18, 2018

How Would You Rate Your Mental Health?

How good is your mental health? Are there issues that you may need to address? Do you take the time to just relax and meditate from time to time?

WELL BEING


Your mental health may be more important that you think. Balance is the so very important in maintaining good mental, physical and spiritual health.

1. Positive Impact 

According to helpguide.org doing things to positively help others will build your self-esteem. I see it as a win/win situation, because both you and others will benefit. What do you think? They further emphasize connecting with others by spending time daily with people that you like. I have found that that is so important. My husband and I  took a trip previously and met with my sister and brother-in-law at a resort. Although, we live in different states and do not see each other often, it was quite pleasurable to enjoy each others company and share this time together. We reminisced about childhood days and future goals. This was quite refreshing. It was only for a couple of days, but it was well worth the time. You may also like:


I find that talking to others about themselves or their families causes good connections. Who does not want to talk and brag about their families? Just letting others know that you care and that you are concerned is good, because you never know what others may be experiencing at that time.



2. Throwing a Ball

Do you constantly ask questions and observe your surroundings. Have you ever observed young children? I have noticed all the questions that they ask. Their brains are like sponges soaking in all the information they receive. You want to exercise your brain by doing the same. Also throwing a ball improves your hand-eye coordination and keeps them sharp well into old age. Again, observe children, they seem to love to play ball. I recall as a child that there were many children in my neighborhood. We would all gather to play kickball. Children were even coming from other neighborhoods just to play with us. I loved that game.


3. Read a Book and Reduce Your Stress
Did you know that there has been new research that suggests reading a book can increase your intelligence according to realsimple.com. They further add that reading may reduce stress up to 68 %.  Also,   Mayo Clinic suggests that reading a book before bedtime may help you wind down. I know that is right. I have definitely found that to be true for myself. Do you recall reading a novel and actually feeling many of the sensations or events that you were reading about? I have experienced that. I was reading a novel about a girl that had been mistreated during childhood. As I read, it was as though I could feel those awful feelings that she was feeling.



4. Quiet Your Mind

According to the University of Michigan meditating and prayer can improve Your state of mind. I have also found that deep breathing is very beneficial to me. Sometimes we
do not think about our breathing as we go through our daily tasks. It is important to be aware that our emotions may affect our breathing. For example for those of you that like scary movies, your breathing may change rapidly in that instant. Your heart rate may speed up. It is important not to stay in a “flight or fight” mode all of the time, because the body needs to rest at some point in time.

NOTE:

Remember you are never too old to learn. Learning new experiences, attempting new endeavors, and reading are just a few things that can keep your brain alert.

Photo Caption: Pixabay

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Friday, May 11, 2018

5 of My New Favorite Things (OMG)

When I learn about something that really helps me out, I want to share it with you. Besides the fact that these things help me, I really like them. I just had to let you know about them.

Favorites
 


I really love my favorite things. I wish I new about them sooner.


These can be found at a variety of places such as Meijer, Walmart, and Office Depo. They are fairly inexpensive ranging from $30.00 and up. I have purchased Dash Cams in the past from Walmart and Meijer and had great success with them. They instantly can be mounted inside your vehicle on your front window. They come with single footage or rear and front footage. You would be surprised at how helpful they may be to you. The disc for recording is usually sold separate.

My dash cam was useful during an incident when a teen-age girl was assaulted. She and the 2 teens that assaulted her ran directly in front of my car as she attempted to get away. I was thankful that I did not hit them with my car. When the police came, I was able to assist by giving the police the disc from my dash cam that recorded it all. The pictures were very clear and distinct. God had me at the right place at the right time. Maybe you can think of an incident that occurred with your vehicle. Possibly a dash camcorder would have captured and recorded everything.




Now the ingredients are Lavender and Chamomile. I remember bathing my babies in this. I thought if it is good for babies maybe it is good for me. I tried it in the shower. It is amazing. I see how it relaxes a baby. If you have ever taken a muscle relaxer, then you have an idea how well this baby bath works on adults. It is so relaxing. I sleep well, but the sleep after using this product is even better.

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Do You Know About Poo Spray?






I purchased mine at Walmart. It was very inexpensive. It was one of the best things that I could do. I have had mine for some time now. The newer ones are wireless also and you just lay your cellphone on top of it to recharge. Even though you may keep your cellphone charged, there may be instances where you discover it needs a charge. If you are out and about, this cellphone instant charger may be just what you need.  You can use it anywhere.   Just plug it into your cellphone and it will charge your phone in a matter of minutes. No electrical outlet is needed. How awesome is that?



These also are inexpensive. I have purchased them 4 for $1.00 or even as low as 8 for $1.00 I like them because they are not messy like the old paste. They come in handy for envelopes or odd papers. The sticks slides the glue on easily without any mess. Easy for children to use too.


These are Also, only $1.00. Now you can also find word-finds on the internet, but I prefer the actual book. That is my preference. My favorite word-finds, are chicken soup for the soul, Bible word-finds, and Jumbo Print.  Word-finds are good for keeping the brain active. 

Photo Caption:  Wilicommons


What are some of your favorite things?



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Friday, May 4, 2018

My Favorite Staycations for Family

So you want to go on vacation, but feel that you cannot afford it. Did you know that you do not have to travel across the world for a vacation? Instead plan a staycation for your family.

Sea Life in Auburn Hills, MI




1. Sea Life 

Sea Life Aquarium in Auburn Hills is just awesome. There are various colorful fish that you will see. Sea Life is located at 4316 Baldwin Road, Auburn Hill, Michigan 48326. 


The hours for Sea Life in Auburn Hills are Monday through Friday 10 am-9pm,
Saturday 10 am-9pm, and Sunday 10 am-6pm. Now because of the awesome response they are recommending to ore-book online. There is limited availability for walk-up tickets. General Admission is as low as $14.00 per person and a better savings when booking online.

Facts

You will see over 5,000 creatures and there are 32 locations all over the world. I saw beautiful Sting- Rays, Sharks, and much more. Children were amazed to to see these creatures. I found it to be fascinating.





Hands On at Sea Life

The great thing about the hands on at Sea Life is that everything that you see in the video below could be touched. Children love putting their hands in the water and touching the creatures.



2. Michigan Adventure- Located at 1198 W. Riley-Thompson Rd, Muskegon, Mi 49445, 

We were not able to see all that there was to see, but I had a great time. Some of the sites you will want to see when you get there are as follows: The Lagoon, Mine Shaft, Half-Pint Paradise and much, much more.

I was quite impressed with the food. I ordered chicken tenders and they were nice and tender as well as seasoned just right. I usually take a picture of my food, but their food was so great that I completely forgot.


Muskegon Water Park


Ball Python

Ball Python found in the Reptile Center at Camp Copneconic YMCA


 3.  Camp Copneconic 


It is located at 10407 North Fenton Road, Michigan. 8 am to 5 pm. Day camps are awesome. Activities may include, brushing the horses, hiking the nature trails to do bird watching, group activities to include relay races, a visit to the reptile center, and much more.

Splash Pad in Grand Blanc, Mi



You will find it at Creasey Bicentennial Park, 1505 E. Grand Blanc Road, Grand Blanc, Michigan 

It is open at 11 am starting in June. The great thing about the splash pad is that unlike a swimming pool, it is water squirting out of various outlets on the pads. Children of all ages including toddlers can enjoy this. There are benches on the sides where the parents can sit to observe their children. It is a very colorful Splash Pad; in fact, it has a rainbow of colors.


5. PaintBall,  Located 4403 Clio Road, Flint, Michigan 48504

I Thought Paint Ball was just for adults, but I discovered that children can play too. They offer birthday parties and it is a place for family fun. Get a little paint on your clothing don't worry it is washable.


6.
WildernessTrail Zoo,Located 11721 Gera Rd Birch Run, Mi 48415,  


This is a small petting zoo, but quite nice. They have food available to feed the various animals. I love the hands on area for petting the animals. Feed stations to feed the animals are located throughout the zoo. I discovered this zoo one day while on my way to Bronner's in Frankenmuth.

7.Lion Country Safari,2003 Lion Country Safari Road, West Palm Beach, Florida, 

Giraffe at Lion Country Safari


For those of you that live in Florida, this is an amazing Safari. You will be able to walk through and see many of the animals. Even touching and feeding them. The Giraffe shown in this article was very friendly and loved for anyone to feed him. I never really thought about how tall a giraffe is until I was actually up there feeding him. Another part of this safari that I liked was the one that you would drive through and view the animals. This is the one where you definitely do not want to get out of your car until the tour is finished.



Do you want to go back in time? When you are at Greenfield Village, that is exactly what it feels like. You need to see it to believe it. It is an awesome experience. There are so many historical districts to see.
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Friday, April 27, 2018

9 Questions You Should Ask Before Your Marriage

Are you contemplating marriage? There are a few questions you might want to ask your future spouse before marriage. How many times have people gone into marriage with blinders on?

Marriage Tips


Seeking marriage advice from your pastor, counselor, and parent is not a bad idea, because they are usually in most cases experienced and wiser. You can learn from others mistakes and hardships.

1. Intentions

When that man is pursuing you and you have been dating for awhile, you may want to ask this man, directly, “What are your intentions?” Why? The reason is that both of you may not be on the same page. Possibly he or she has no intentions of marrying you. This is one of the questions that I asked my husband before marriage. You should not assume that he or she wants to get married. There are women that prefer not to be married and that is definitely their choice. There are many self-sufficient women and men that lead a fulfilling life without marriage.

2. Children

This should be a discussion for both of you. Some come from large families and subsequently, may want to have a large family. Whereas maybe you only want 2 children or none at all.

3. Financial and Religious Views

That old adage that “opposites attract” may be true. Possibly you are a saver and your fiance' is a spender. This is something that you both will have to deal with. You want to have some balance in your life. Does he or she spend their paycheck immediately without tithing or saving 10%? Does he or she love God or even believe in God? One question I asked my spouse before marriage, “Are you saved?”

4. Reason

Are both of your getting married for the right reason? Some women dream of the fantasy of a big marriage with them dressed in white, many bridesmaids, and a lavish honeymoon. Some even spend thousands of dollars on marriage only to divorce within several years. Are you getting married because of all the hype about marriage? Are you considering the bad times that may occur as well as the good time. What if after marriage he or she becomes seriously ill? Are you in love enough to stick it out with your partner or will you leave when things get rough?

5. Change

Are you getting married with the hopes of changing your spouse? Sometimes, what you see is what you get. Only your spouse can change themselves not you. Hopefully, you will bring out the best in each other.

6. Chemistry

Yes get married because you love the person. Chemistry is important in marriage. It is good to be attracted to one another. Do not just marry basically for looks, because looks can change in time. Remember not everyone will appear the same. There may be the occurrence of weight gain, gray hairs, bags under the eyes, and I am sure you can probably add to this list. These are just a few questions to ask before marriage.

7. Premarital Counseling

Do not dismiss it before you have tried it. Maybe you have been married more than once and feel you don't need premarital counseling. That may be all the reason to take the counseling classes. Remember you never get too old to learn.

Premarital counseling/classes will give you tools and help you to gain insight regarding problems or situations that you and your fiancé' may encounter in the future. Many times you might say, "I will never do this or I would do thus and so." The reality is that you really don't know until you are in that actual situation.

There are ministers that are willing to offer you the Christian counseling services free, especially when you are a member of that church. The Minister/counselor may bring to your attention subjects regarding finances. Will you have joint accounts because you have now come together as one? How will you discipline your children when they are born? How many children would you like to have? What holidays will you visit the relatives? Remember when you marry each other, you marry each others families. You now have mother-in-laws, father-in-laws, sister-in-laws, and sometimes extended families.


8. Unequally Yoked

Know The Person and Do Not Be Unequally Yoked 2 Cor. 6:14 

No matter how long you are with a person or married to a person you will never know all there is to know about them, that is why it is important to embrace the benefits of premarital counseling. Time allows you to learn some things about a person, but eventually the real person shows up.

If you are a Christian and saved you want your fiancé' to be saved also, before marriage. So this is something that should be discussed early. Now there are situations someone might say, "I am already married." "I was saved and a Christian, but he/she was not." In that case the Bible states, "Let no man separate that which God has joined together." Matthew 19:6. These are not my words, but God's words. I am talking about those that knowingly enter a relationship knowing the other is not of the same faith.

When people first meet they are often on their best behavior, but that does not last forever. Someway, somehow the real person will show up. Many times you will hide the real you, because you don't want to scare your fiancé off. Also, in the beginning everything is so new and fresh. It is almost like being in another world.

9. Who will clean the House?

It is no longer traditional that just the woman clean the house, because many women are working long hours just like men. Maybe the woman makes more than her fiancé, does that mean that she controls all the money? These are just a few of the issues that may need to be considered, discussed, and addressed.

You may find that you think differently than your fiancé'. Just because you are getting married does not mean you will agree on everything. Remember you were raised by different parents. Hopefully, you both will have the same main core values.

What other questions would you want to ask before marriage?

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Pixabay,  CCO Creative Commons 

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Bloggers Meet and Greet May 2018- Mother's Day

Mother's Day is May 13, 2018.  Think about this.  Have there been certain woman in your life that really influenced you? Maybe a friend or relative helped to mold you. I would like to talk about 3 important women that influenced my life.


My grandmother- Mary Grant

1. My mother

I did not know a lot about my mother. I lived with my father and grandmother, but there are a few things that I do remember about her. My mother was very out spoken. She seemed almost fearless. I know that if it were not for God, my mother and father I would not be here today. My mother was a fast talker. I remember many times that she would out talk my father. When I lived with my father he would always take me to visit my mother. I told him one day, “Why do I need to visit my mother, I have you.?” I was about 3 or 4 years old. He looked at me and said in a soft voice, “You are going to see your mother.” That was the end of that discussion.

2. My grandmother

I remember her very well. She was a short petite, feisty woman. She also was a talker. She said what she meant and meant what she said. I called her mama. I did not understand why my father had to go to work. I would ask him to stay home with me. He would try and explain that he had a boss and needed to go to work. I recall her and my mother did not seem to get along very well. Whenever, they saw each other it would end in an argument. Then there were 2 strong-will women arguing. Neither one of them seemingly backing down. My grandmother nor my father attended church, but they did allow me to attend with my neighbors. I loved church. I thought it was so exciting. My grandmother would walk me to school. I started at age 4. The school was about 4 to 5 blocks. I told my grandmother, “ I know my way, you do not have to walk me to school.” She was protective of me and walked me to school anyway. We had a strawberry patch in the backyard. She would let me go into the back and pick fresh strawberries. I loved to do that. The strawberries seemed so sweet.


3. Finally there was my Aunt Mary

My grandmother and I went to live with my aunt and uncle when I was older. There were so many children in the neighborhood that there was never a dull moment. I recall that I used to visit before coming to live with my aunt and uncle. She took me to get my picture taken. I was afraid she would leave me, but she stood right there. My aunt always talk to me about everything. She talked a lot about life. She taught me to crochet and to dust and sweep the floors. I would love dusting, because she had this spray that I sprayed on the furniture and it smelled so good. I loved to dust.

What women influenced you?

Note:

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