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Saturday, January 9, 2010

How You and Your Spouse Can Stay On The Same Page With Your Child

Marriage of husband and wife

Before you married, hopefully, you and your husband discussed how you would train your child. It is important to keep in mind that you and your husband were 2 people that came together as one. Hopefully, you have the same main values, but your opinions may differ on various things. What if dad doesn’t do an activity with his/her child the way that mom does. Mom, just pray, relax, and remember this is your husband’s child also. He loves his child just as much as you do.

1. United Front.

It is important that you and your husband exhibit a united front. Bill Cosby often mentioned this on “The Bill Cosby Show.” It is okay for you and your husband to disagree about actions regarding your child, but do it in private, away from your child. Disagreements can be good at times. It is good to discuss each others views. Remember there is no right or wrong answer.

2. Conquer and Divide.

Do not underestimate your child. If your child finds a weak link in you & your husband’s relationship, guess what? He/she will use it to conquer and divide the two of you, because your child wants his/her own way. Yes, your sweet, cute, charming, handsome child.

3. Begging and Whining.

Your child will discover early, which parent is the weakest and will beg or try whining to wear that parent down to get what he or she wants. Again, both parents must get together and present a united front. As much as possible both parents need to be united in the decision- making process.

4. Don’t Tell.

When a child asks one parent not to tell the other parent something, it can cause division and secrecy in the husband and wife relationship.

5. Oldest Trick.

One of the oldest trick is that your child may ask you to do something or go somewhere knowing already that your spouse has said, “No.” Always be sure and check with your spouse. If this happens, talk to your child as well. Express that this is unacceptable behavior and will not be tolerated by neither you nor your spouse.

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