Should children have a choice as to
whether they go to church? What is the reasoning behind why
children do not want to go to church? Are there many children in your
church?
Are children at church because their
parents are forcing them to go to church? Possibly when you and your
family joined church and your children were younger, they accepted
going to church. Your children going to church was a norm at one
time. Then as your children got older into the adolescent and teen
years, they started questioning going to church possibly saying that
it was not for them.
When I was about 4-years-old I
observed my neighbors going to church. My father nor grandmother
did not attend. I asked to go with my neighbors, because I was
curious. I had already been trying to read my Bible and knew about
God, but I could not figure out what was so important about church.
After I went the first time I loved it. I did not realize it was a
Methodist Church, I just knew it was church.
1. This Church
Possibly your children feel that they
do not fit in at this particular church. Could there be a disconnect
with with pastor, leaders, or other children at the church? Some
pastors may emphasize they are more concerned with the person being
saved and that each individual can choose the church he or she
wants to attend.
2. Boring
Are Your children saying that church is
boring? I recall one of my children stating, “Church is so boring,
I do not understand what that man is talking about?” According to
a survey from the
Barna Group at Barna.org. 31% of teens stated that church was boring. They further added that 24% felt church was irrelevant to their careers. So when teenagers and young adults start working, does church take a back seat for them? Do they arrive at church halfway through the program on purpose, because they just do not want to be there? This could also apply to adults. I have observed several adults coming into our church service habitually late.
Barna Group at Barna.org. 31% of teens stated that church was boring. They further added that 24% felt church was irrelevant to their careers. So when teenagers and young adults start working, does church take a back seat for them? Do they arrive at church halfway through the program on purpose, because they just do not want to be there? This could also apply to adults. I have observed several adults coming into our church service habitually late.
3. Belonging
Do your children feel as though they
belong in your church? Sometimes children may feel as though they
are not apart of the church even though they attend it, according to ministrytodaymag.com.
When
you think about it, everyone wants to feel as though they are apart
of something, including children. I recall as a child going to the
Amusement Park with my church. This was an event that I will never
forget.
4. Invitation
Children love their peer group. Have
your children ever invited a friend to church? Sometimes just having
their friend there can make all the difference. Now if their
friends go with them to sporting events, skating, or the arcades, why
not allow them to invite a friend to church? I recall many
children living in my neighborhood when I grew up. Because I loved
church, I wanted all my friends to come and enjoy it as well. It
never occurred to me that there were those that did not like church.
I later became Sunday School Secretary and Church Secretary. This
now became a very big learning experience, because my pastor at the
time was very meticulous and taught me a lot about bookkeeping and
the importance of it.
5. Extra-Curricular Activities
I talked with a group of children and
they expressed that they had so many extra-curricular activities
throughout the week that they just wanted to sleep in on the weekends
because they were so tired.
6. Soccer Games or Other Games
There was a time that Sunday was for
going to church, but have you observed that some of the soccer games
or other athletic events are now on Sunday?
7. Family
Your church may be a good fit for you,
but is it a good fit for your entire family? Do your children feel
that they have a part in the church or are they just their? Do they
realize the importance of attending church?
8. Length of Service
I have heard children complain about
the length of the service. I know I also have heard adults state
that when they were children going to church, the service might last
about all day, 5-6 hours.
Times have changed. People's attention
span is not necessarily that long. Even adults now do not want to
sit in church all day. Everyone seemingly has their own
preferences.
9. Fun
Is everyone always serious at church?
Children want to have fun. They need to know that church can be fun
while learning about Jesus. Does your face always have a stern
look? Do you smile and even sometimes share a joke to create
laughter. Do your children have fun activities at church?
So do your kids hate church? Are they
actively involved in your church? Do they even want to be there?
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We struggled with this a long time...especially with my oldest. My solution was finally giving them a choice...they could go to regular church or Wednesday night. My oldest and youngest chose Wednesday night, and my middle kiddo, who's a little more of an introvert, choose Sunday. I still get some flack from them about it but not as much and they seem to be happier abou ti...they are getting community and instruction, so I don't feel like which day they go is as important.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Betty! This gives good food for thought and reasons to consider.
ReplyDeleteYour welcome Carlie. Thanks for stopping by.
DeleteI have heard of kids not liking church, but I have never had this issue with any of my kids and they are still active in our church today, as college kids. I love my church and my kids love it too. The programs for youth in our church are excellent. Anyway, thoughtful post. :)
ReplyDeleteI know you are so proud Camie.
DeleteSo far our daughter is a willing church goer. We did have a bit of an uphill battle getting her to give youth group a try, but she was ready for that in her own time. I think the family narrative on church attendance is the most important thing. When everyone goes and talks about it after, how could you let yourself miss out?
ReplyDeleteThat sounds great Joey.
DeleteSo far i daughter loves going to the church..But these thoughts are definitely something to ponder on..
ReplyDeletehttp://www.simpleindianmom.in/benefits-cloves-must-know/
Menaka that is great your daughter loves church and a blessing.
DeleteThanks for sharing with us at Love to Learn. Pinned.
ReplyDeleteYour welcome Mother of 3.
ReplyDeleteWe are not Christian and church is not part of our experience. However, I still found several take aways in your post. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteDr. Elise I am saved and believe in Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I am so glad you were able to get something from the article.
ReplyDelete